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October 2007  |  December 2007

Saturday, December 8, 2007 BEING HOME What an amazing journey we’ve had over the last few months. We returned to Portland after living in Ireland for two years, we traveled to China and met our amazing daughter and we moved into our new/old home. Without fail, every single day has presented new challenges and joys to us. Life is just so very sweet. I think one of the reasons it’s taken me so long to get back to this final website posting is because every time I sit down to write about Nola, words escape me. It’s like all of these emotions come flooding up to the surface and then...then...words don’t seem to do it justice. I think one of the most amazing things to me is that she is OUR daughter, so very much OUR daughter, and I can’t imagine our family any other way. After reading all of the appropriate books and following other family’s stories of adoption, we were prepared for issues. We were concerned about attachment issues (either from her or from us), the potential for significant health or developmental issues, behavioral problems associated with the transition, etc. Yet, after we met her and embraced her life into ours, none of these things transpired. Nola seemed to easily transfer the bond, attachment and feelings of love and security that she had felt with her foster family to us. I have no doubt that, on the inside, she was struggling with the transition. It was obvious, from the way her foster parents held her and cried for her on the day they handed her over to us, and from the photos they gave us of Nola playing and laughing with her foster sister, that she was grieving for them. She obviously loved her foster family very much. However, just like the books tell you, she was able to take that attachment and love and feeling of security and transfer it to us. People familiar with adoption issues watch our family and are amazed by how well we interact. Most of the time it feels as if we’ve always been together. Eric and I have taken to this whole parenting thing pretty well. I think it helps that we were always a little goofy to begin with. Perfect for spending time with a toddler. Nola’s just awesome to hang out with. She has a spark that everyone around her can see. She’s inquisitive and kind and she’s got the greatest laugh. I’d be lying if I told you that it was a piece of cake. There’s teething days, sick days, grumpy days, long days. We have our share, but we work through them and we always get a sweet sweet kiss, big, bear hug and the cheery “ni-night” at the end of the day, and that makes everything all better again. We spent most of our first month trying to get settled into our home and we’re mostly there now. We all shared a family bed for the first month we were together and then, when we got Nola’s room ready, we were ready to make the transition to moving her into the crib. Just as I expected, there was a struggle and lots of crying...but it was from me! She loves the crib. She loves having her own space where she can hang out with her animals and dolls. She’s got Teddy (thank you Gina) and Pillbug (thank you Ikea) and Jack and Molly (the rabbit twins, thank you Annie) and Bunny (thank you Cindy) and Baby (thank you Monteiths) and she’s even got my teddy bear from when I was young. I love listening to her in the baby monitor as she talks to them and takes care of them. It’s very sweet. She’s quite verbal and she can say all kinds of words these days. It’s just a matter of her choosing to say them. She can say “hello” (he-doh), “please” (pees), “thank you” (deedoo), “apple” (bappo), “light” (yight), “banana” (nana),...and loads more. She waves good-bye and blows kisses. Yesterday she told us a very long and twisting story. I’m not sure what it was all about, but from her hand gestures, it appeared to be related to grand things and/or window casing. She absolutely loves books. We read to her every day, without fail, both before naptime and bedtime. Even without our encouragement, she now climbs up onto her chair (or the bench that Carrie made her!), lays a book out and flips through the pages, making the noises of the animals on each page, or telling the story from her perspective. She mimics the sounds that Mama and Papa make when we read her the story and she adds her own little twists. She’s really quite brilliant you know. While she’s wary of strangers, she warms up to people pretty quickly when Mama and Papa have given the OK. We had Thanksgiving at our home and we’ve had folks over for dinner about once a week since we’ve been moved in, and Nola will spend the evening charming our guests and wooing the food off of their plates. She still eats really well, but she’s been gradually getting pickier. I think she’s realized that food is a very plentiful thing around these parts and that she doesn’t need to eat everything that comes her way. Just last night she passed up the chard and the root vegetable gratin only to focus her attention on the steak. Duh. She’s gained several pounds since joining our family. She now has the cute little creases at her wrists, dimples at her knuckles and sweet, chunky thighs. I love watching how she changes everyday. One day she’s figured this out, the next day she’s gotten the hang of that. Her interests change constantly and I love taking her to the indoor play park to see what toys she’ll now be drawn to. Yesterday it was the trampoline (whew, big hit), the kitchen with all the cool, plastic food and whatever the bigger kids seemed to be playing with. She likes to hang with the big kids, but often they don’t have time for her. The exception is our cool neighbor Elijah, who seems to have quite the soft spot in his big-boy heart for the “Baby Nola”.

Nola loves the beach Nola sees the pumpkin she wants Nola and Daddy play piano Hangin' out at our little slice of heaven Nola spots something Our little cowgirl Nola loves loves loves Jezebel

Eric got a great new gig at his company and I’ll be going back to work in January. I’ve lined up daycare, but I’m just not sure how many hours I’ll be putting in. I’m thinking half-time to start. I can’t even imagine being away from her for eight hours at a stretch, and it seems it’s just too early for that. Just like the crib, she’ll probably be just fine with the situation and it’ll be Mom that cracks. We’ll see how it goes. In the mean time, we’re looking forward to a wonderful first Christmas at our home with Nana and Grandpa and Aunt Jennifer and her friend Eric (yes, we have two Jen and Eric’s in the family...how chippy are we?). Nola will be absolutely smothered with snuggles and love, and I wouldn’t be surprised if she asks for a little “me time” by the time the New Year rolls around. This is our last update on this website. All things Nola will now come in the form of holiday cards, phone calls and dinners at our place. Or you could join us at the play park?! Thanks to each and every one of you, our loved ones, for your gifts, good wishes and loving thoughts for Nola and our family. Your words carried us through some tough times, and we’ll keep all of those words to share with Nola when she’s older. Thank you for joining us on our journey. It’s good to be on the other side. Peace be with you all... Jen, Eric and Nola

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