Thursday,
May 20, 2010
BABY BONDING . . .
Our little peanut slept in and didn’t even make a peep until
nearly 8 am…which also means we slept in as well…normally we
both shower prior to her waking. I was able to get my shower in,
but she would have no part of Mel taking a shower and being with
me alone….very clingy this morning and a bit whiny too. She
asked for puffs and milk and did not want to stop eating puffs,
tried a cheerio but prefers the puffs. Nothing much suits her
this morning especially me…I think this might be wearing on Mel
a bit, but he is being a trooper…imagine this to stop her crying
this morning I handed Emma to him then proceeded to put his
pants on him, his shirt and shoes…he dresses the baby and I
dress him. The other night at dinner he fed Emma and I fed him
can you even imagine what all the Chinese people in the
restaurant thought…I am thinking whatever works…
Breakfast this morning was a challenge…noodles no go, eggs no
go, bread ate a little, milk no go…cranky and whiny. finally she
asked me to feed her the same noodles on her plate from my
plate…I took this as a break through as she has not allowed me
to feed her at all …just prepare food. Day 2 at breakfast she
wouldn’t even eat in front of me. None of us really ate much at
one point she did the stiff arm move and cleared the table of
eggs and milk…we must work on this.
We came back to the room and they were cleaning so we waiting in
the lobby area of our floor…finally when we got in the room her
mood shifted and she brought me noodles to make her and she was
a different girl after eating them. She actually played with me
while Mel read the paper, she would bring me a crayon and then
come and get it and give me another one…we played little game
like that for quite awhile. She loves to fold as in she can fold
clothes…no joke she can fold a wash cloth or small blanket
perfectly. She like to take a bag and fill it and carry it
around…I think she is hinting for a purse. She loves to help me
as in really help. When I put drinks in the fridge she goes to
get another one and brings it to me…I find it amazing. She won’t
sit in her pretty snazzy stroller but she loves to load it down
with toys and put them in and out. She also likes her dolly and
will love her and then toss her with the speed of a major league
pitcher and smile….
She will allow Mel to read to her and actually will draw on her
little magna doodle, she colors a bit, but love love loves the
stacking cups and her little music toys and the blocks…our room
looks like a toy store, we literally brought one carryon of
toys…we hear you over in Asheville laughing and yes we have the
puppet show too…hee hee. We have also bought toys here…blocks, a
music piano, flutes, balls, ducks and bubbles…Mel sheepishly
asked how are we going to get all these toys home…and I said we
are going to toss the full pack of 48 pull-ups that won’t be
needed as she has only used 3 in the time we are here and I
brought 2 full packs of 48…and then there is all the hygiene
products we have no time to use, the extra hand sanitizer, the
lotion, and the list goes on…I will take of photo of what we
leave here in Nanning…and worst case and extra suitcase is not
out of the question.
Our care package arrived yesterday and it was like Christmas
gummies for Emma and junk for us…for any of you families
waiting…send yourself care packages little shoe boxes with
goodies it is so awesome to receive and by the time it gets here
you need the little bits of comfort from home….and if you have
extra offer your travel mates…then they are putty in your
hands….all good!
I forgot one major thing from yesterday…Emma walked over to me
and gestured for me to button her sweater up…this was major and
reached out for me to hold her…not in a put me to sleep way but
hold me….let me tell you the waterworks went crazy on that one….
I have read adoption blogs for years and I have read where
families experience what we are where the child clings to the
father instead of the Mom and living it is totally different
than reading it and don’t get me wrong…no pitty needed on
me….but I have never had to work like this for little bits in
return….what is so hard is I can see it in her eyes she wants to
let me in but she is so afraid….I want for her to be in a place
where her guard is down and she can just accept all that we
have…she will get there and I want to give her my all, but right
now she will only allow itty bitty pieces and then she shuts
down a bit. Some day we will be on the other side looking back
and just trying to imagine this little peanut and where she is
now….but for now we just keep the focus on her and giving her
love in little bits and hoping each day she accepts more.
After our fun play time this morning we again dined in the hotel
restaurant…almost like a groundhog day scene…same menu, same
staff, same hot room, same people dining with us…Emma ate her
weight in noodles and then chowed on Mel’s ham and cheese
sandwich….her tummy still is not bulging like you would expect.
Then it was nap time and again Mel was the hero…for the last 2
days she won’t let me put her down for nap or bedtime. but we
prop Mel on the couch…neck brace and all, feet up on table and
dim the room and then it is a race as to who snores
first….sometimes it is like a snoring duet. Today I dozed a bit
too, but not much. She woke up and did not like seeing me first
so Mel rescued her and eventually she came out of her shell
again….
We had hoped to go to the park, but decided enduring the heat
was not in the cards today…so we roomed it all day. I organized
our suitcases with the help of Emma and sent out the laundry and
then our guide came by so we could check the paperwork for
correctness…then guess what it was dinner time….
We broke our habits and both ordered a pasta dish and garlic
bread…no vampires will sneak up on us tonight….the garlic bread
had the real deal on it and my pasta was also very garlicky but
good…the peanut ate nearly nothing but drank a liter of orange
drink….another family dined with us, they have a 3 ½ year old
and Emma was mesmerized by him. We returned to the room and
decided to tackle the bath…to this point we have done sponge
baths…at one point we were all scrunched up in our tiny 5x4we
were all scrunched up in our tiny 5x5 bath and then Mel got in
and I gave him Emma, she didn’t like it one bit would not sit in
the water and cried the whole time nearly…not sure if she has
had a real bath ever. I hope bathing with Cissy Ellie Lu will
change this for her…we did the minimal or as Mel would call it a
“dippity do”, then the worst Mel wanted to take a shower so I
held her while he showed…she cried almost to the point of
throwing up wanting him and I was in the bathroom and we had the
show curtain pulled back…his shower seemed like an eternity to
me and I am sure to Emma too. Finally he was done and we both
prepared Emma for bed…this time I held her and Mel gave her the
cough medicine…she has been more cold to me since I gave it to
her yesterday and it took 3 tries. This time went well I held
her which she wasn’t happy about but it sort of caught her off
guide and I tilted her back a bit and Mel put the medicine
in….we will get this down…tag team parenting. Tonight she would
not fall asleep being rocked so Mel put her in bed with him and
they snuggled and out she went…praise the Lord so far she has
slept well….little blessings.
Ellie Lu Update:
Hey Em Mel and Emma, It is Wednesday afternoon, Ellie and I
have been getting Earl's clothes ready for his trip. Ellie is
now taking a nap. I promised her we would go shopping again when
she woke up. I for one can't wait. Last night we bottled 500
gallon of milk and 100 gallon of chocolate milk. This is her
second experience and she was quite helpful. Her job was to
bring the crates in one at a time. She never quit. Stayed right
with the job and was so enthusiastic. She is following you all
on the computer. Talks about home very matter of factly and
seems to know that it is there and she is here. No tears or
worries evident. Talks about her friends at school, tells us all
the dirt on them. HA Keeps everyone on their toes doing things
right, no shortcuts, and loves the dog Puppy and all of the
cats. Puppy hasn't had so much attention "ever".
We were able to talk to Ellie Lu along time today…hi Momma,
where are you China?” yes we are bringing Cissy home…are you
excited? “Yes”, “Momma, where is my car?” It is at home…”Where
is Daddy?” Right here do you want to talk to him “Yes,
Daddy……….” They talked awhile and then we chitchatted again…keep
in mind it was 11 pm ish at home she and Aunt Sheshee were
having a slumber part as CoCo and Uncle Earl were on a
trip…girls just want to have fun. Sounds like everyone is doing
well at home….
In Memory of my Dad . . .
Who passed on May 16, 2010…today is a bitter sweet day as he
will be layed to rest and we are 7000 miles away. He has been in
declining health since Christmas, but was hospitalized after we
left for China and subsequently passed. We were not notified of
this until after having Emma placed in our arms…I am thankful we
were able to focus on her arrival as there was nothing we could
do from such a distance…Dad was anxious for another grand
daughter and even though he was not always clear minded in the
last few months he would always ask when are you going to bring
my grand daughter home…ironically as we were bringing Emma home
Dad went home to be with the Lord….our hearts are heavy, but our
memories are full, thank you Dad for life and brothers and
sisters to share it with….you were one of a kind. Dad
would want us to use all the energy we have to focus on Emma and
that is what we are doing…when we return home the reality of his
passing will begin to sink in.
Dad turned 80 in March and these are some photos from us
gathering to celebrate that special milestone for him…
Our Family
Chain
We little knew that morning
That God would call your name.
In life we loved you dearly;
In death we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
But you did not go alone,
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home.
You left us beautiful memories,
Your love is still our guide,
And though we cannot see you,
You are always by our side.
Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same,
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.
~Author Unknown
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They both got up on the wrong side of the bed
Enjoying a Chinese mini moon pie
Mel's Crayon drawing of Guilin
Too cute for words
The look...the feet...
The laundry returned and nicely packaged
The happy bag dragger
Trying on shoes
Snuggle Bunnies
She let me hold her...her choice…
and button her sweater
Ellie Lu adored her Pop Pop
Me and Dad
Me, Colin and Dad . . . celebrating 80 years |
