In China
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Saturday, March 16, 2013 Becoming the Man with the Yellow Hat Having spent almost a week with Sam and Ellie by now, we are starting to have a better picture of who they are. (Back to an earlier reference to The Bachelor, I would now be ready to propose marriage…) So for the next couple of entries, I will try to paint a picture of each of them so you can begin to understand and love them the way we already do. Today, I will focus on Sam. His description should be the easier one because he can be summarized in two words: Curious George. For those who do not know the character of Curious George from the children’s books, he is a happy and curious little monkey. As curious monkeys tend to do, he likes to climb and explore and follow his curiosity into interesting places… leaving his caretaker (the Man with the Yellow Hat) to scramble around trying to prevent curiosity from becoming disaster. But somehow, everything ends well… and George goes on joyfully to his next adventure. I do not own a yellow hat, but I have never related more to a children’s book character than I do to my canary-chapeaued friend. Anne and I spend 30% of the day chasing Sammy, 30% of the day trying to help him down from his current predicament, and 40% of the day laughing with him that he somehow managed not to get hurt. Then something else will capture his attention (e.g. an escalator, the openable window of our 30th floor hotel room, or the “looks like it would be fun to ride” luggage carrier at the airport) and off we go to the next adventure. Fortunately, Sam is as tough as he is curious. As highlighted in some of his photos, Sam thinks of himself as a pretty strong little man. He falls frequently (if “fall” is the correct word when it comes after an ill-advised “leap”), but he never stays down for long. As you might imagine, Sam is also very passionate. If I leave the room to run an errand, he is incredibly excited when I come back in the door. This manifests itself as a scream of “Baba!” followed by hurling himself across the room at me. On one occasion, I opened the door to a shirtless Sammy sprinting across the room… then launching himself at me. (Given his height, “at me” essentially meant that I was taking a helmet to the groin. In the NFL, it would probably have cost him 15 yards for unsportsmanlike behavior.) We have generally not allowed our boys to play football, but it might be a crime against society to prevent Sammy from the potential of a Pro Bowl career as a linebacker. (Given that he looks Polynesian in some of his photos, I have equated him at times to Manti Te’o… the linebacker from Notre Dame. He also has a tendency of starting up conversations and occasionally saying “Wa Ai Ne”/”I love you” to people he doesn’t really know… which would also fit with the Manti analogy.) On the subject of the other boys, we have had to change our directions for them. We warned them before we left that they would not be able to wrestle with Sammy like they do with each other for fear that they might scare or hurt him. We have revised our warning about wrestling… but Sammy is no longer the person we are trying to protect… His passion does not just show up physically… it also shows up vocally. Sam’s voice is often as loud as his personality. Whenever Anne or I leave the table to grab another yogurt or some more bacon (because there is literally no such thing as “enough bacon”), Sam will frequently turn around and yell back to us at the top of his voice… “Mama!” or “Mama! Wa Ai Ni! (I love you!)” And as every Chinese face in the restaurant turns to judge us, the seasoned parent in us wants to ask him to be quiet… but the new parent in us just wants him to keep yelling. While I have focused on the “big” aspects of Sam’s personality, I do not want to neglect that we have also seen a lot of love and tenderness. In contrast to the voice screaming his love for both Mama and Bacon across a room, Sammy also has a quiet, almost scratchy voice. (Picture a 3 year old chain smoker.) That is the voice where we hear “Thank you, Baba” or “More pease, Mama.” It is also the voice where he frequently is required to say “Sorry, Ellie” or “Sorry, Mama"… since the above noted traits yield frequent collisions and the need for a follow-up apology. You cannot talk about Sammy without also mentioning his love for Ellie. I will never know the person who decided to mark them as twins (because the growing body of evidence suggests that they are not… a topic for a future blog), but I am eternally grateful for that decision. Were they simply siblings, China would likely have separated them… and that would be one of the great tragedies of all time. These two belong together. No one loves his sister as much as Sam loves Ellie. When she cries, he strokes her arm. When she gets hurt, he runs to get her a Princess band-aid (while frequently helping himself to a Spiderman one at the same time.) When she runs, he follows. When she sits to watch “Happy Goat”, he snuggles next to her. I do not know who Sam would have been without Ellie, and I am glad that I never will.

Dad... could I get some help here? Why slide down when you can "kung fu kick" from the top? Starting at middle linebacker for your Indianapolis Colts... Sam was excited to go on a plane. He was not quite as excited when we told him that was a backpack and not a parachute. This was not staged. This is my son trapped in a luggage cart. (This is also me choosing to take a picture of it before helping him out.) An evening stroll with his best friend. The request was for Sam to "smile." I honestly think he would have done the same thing with a real lion. (NOTE to self: Avoid all zoos and circuses.)

That tender voice I mentioned is also the voice we hear when he prays. I do not pretend to understand all of the biblical references to “speaking in tongues”, but there is something unique about hearing your new son praying for you in Chinese. I hear Chinese phrases interspersed with “Mama”, “Baba”, “Gege” (Big brothers), “Jie Jie” (Big sisters), and, of course, “Ellie.” I do not know all of the words, but I’m pretty sure I know what he’s saying. And for the part where he is praying a blessing for his mom and me, I always smile… because he is the answer to his own prayer. The bible says that “the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” Somehow I think the prayer of a former Chinese orphan may be pretty powerful as well…

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